Recent holiday greeting cards

I just wanted to memorialize my holiday greetings from this recent holiday season.

This was my tongue in cheek greeting to Josh Groban

Also, here's my old pun "Illuminations by 'Josh,' rather than 'Illuminations' by Josh"

And my entry into the ITR poster contest

Here's a get well card I sent to Paris Jackson on twitter in 2013

Be not strong

I’m reading the inscriptions on that video that Connie Talbot tweeted a link to. (https://t.co/66q5WySQvu)

Sigh.

I always hate when people say “Stay strong,” for the same reason that I hate the song, “Smile,” per my immediately previous blog http://straightarrow372.blogspot.com/2015/01/why-i-hate-song-smile.html  

I got that a lot — “Be Strong, Be Positive.” when I was in chemo.

To me, that instruction is more about protecting the sensibilities of the speaker than about helping the person to whom the comment is directed.  They don’t want to be burdened with my negative emotions or my being down.  They want me to put up a strong front so that they don’t have to deal with me when I’m down.

To me, a real friend is willing to let me be weak, doesn’t need me to put on a strong front for them. A real friend would be happy to let me get my negative emotions out and give me a shoulder to cry on.

Unfortunately, tho, I’ve spent so much time trying to be strong that I don’t have many friends who are that sort.  I mostly have friends who expect me to be strong for them.

I don’t really know Connie.  I don’t know how she feels about all this.  Certainly she appreciates the efforts of fans to make her feel better.  

But, as I mentioned before, since she is a person who made her reputation by having a beautiful smile and cute giggle, I wonder if her fans are really able to deal with anything else.

Maybe they don’t have to.  Maybe Connie was just sad about her dad’s illness and now that he’s better she’s better.   I don’t know.

But, still, I wonder whether there isn’t some part of her that wonders, as I wonder when friends say to be “Stay Strong,” whether she is allowed to cry and have negative emotions sometimes as well.

The idea that we can always be happy is a false idea.

Why I hate the song "Smile"

I’m listening to Connie Talbot’s album “Over the Rainbow.”  I’m hearing that song “Smile.”  That song really bugs me.

For me, this is a song about emotional dishonesty. It’s a song about making other people more comfortable at my own expense, by not exposing them to my negative emotions.  

Indeed most people don’t feel that they can cope with negative emotions in others.  Any expression of negative emotions is greeted with an instruction to go to a therapist.  No one is willing just to listen to a friend or acquaintance having a rough spot.

Well, as far as I’m concerned, a person who can’t cope with my negative emotions is not my friend; and the instruction to go to a therapist at the slightest hint of negative emotions is a strong confirmation of that.

I am also a 12 stepper.  One thing I learned in my 12 step programs is that addiction is a result of trying not to deal with emotions — that addicts medicate themselves with substances or behaviors to avoid feeling feelings.  Precisely this sort of emotional dishonesty is the pathway to addiction.

“Smile” was Michael Jackson’s favorite song.  Note what happened to him.

Now, poor Connie Talbot, who sang this song on an album at age 6 or 7, has taken a vacation from twitter because she’s going through a hard time.

That’s understandable.  She’s 14.  That’s a hard time.  The young teen is just learning to cope with a new body, hormonal shifts, new thoughts and feelings. Most teens get stressed.

I think it must be much harder for her.  She’s been spending a lot of her energy being a performer who specializes in smiling a lot and cheering people up.  This grew out of her early experiences singing to her grandmother when her grandmother was dying.  Her grandmother found her singing very comforting.  Connie therefore wanted to keep comforting people with her singing.

There  is at least one YouTube video that focuses only on her giggles.  She was a very cute little kid giggling.

Now she’s a teen and she doesn’t feel like being a cute little girl giggling.  That must be particularly difficult for her, given that she’s been performing for millions of people being a giggler and someone who sings songs to cheer people up.

I wish her well.

But I don’t think that song is a good background at all for dealing with real issues.

Take it down @joshgroban!

Is it still up there?  Surely he’ll have taken it down by now.  He’s a sane fellow.  Surely it will come to him that he’s overdone it this time?

No.  It’s still up.  

Why does the “f” word bother me?

1. I grew up in a community and a family where it wasn’t used and was considered offensive.

2. When other people use it around me, I feel sexually harassed.  They are imposing their sexual thoughts and feelings on me in an unwanted and unsolicited manner.

3. People use this word like “um.”  Amongst young comedians in New York City, who I hang out with, it is commonly used in every sentence -- sometimes several times in a sentence. They know that if they say “Um, well, you know, like…” they will sound dumb.  They have acting and public speaking training.  They know simple rules of articulateness -- BUT they think that, if they substitute the “f” word or the “s” word, no one will notice their mental blanks spots.  They still sound dumb.  When you say the “f” word and the “s” word in virtually every sentence, you sound really, really dumb.

4. I have mild Giles de la Tourette’s Syndrome, with occasional involuntary speaking.  So far, this has never resulted in coprolalia, but then I was raised by people who never used profanity.  It was a very scary thing when my father said “heck,” for instance, because at that time it was unacceptable even to say “hell,” and “heck” was the next closest thing. But sometimes I find now myself using profanity at home, alone.  This scares me.  These foul mouthed kids I hang out with are infecting my speech.

I am literally traumatized  by the use of this word.  It hurts me.  I hate it.  I feel like I'm being beaten every time it is spoken.

But the fact that the “f” word bothers me is not the only issue here.  In this tweet that Josh retweeted on December 29, the “f” word is inserted between the word “Jesus” and the word “Christ.”  This is blatantly offensive to people of the Christian faith.

Now Josh is very PC.  He would never say anything to offend African Americans or gay people or Muslims or Hindus.  Why is it ok to offend Christians?  

It seems especially hypocritical to me that a man who started his career peddling Christian music thinks it’s ok to offend Christians.

I’m not a traditional Christian myself.  I, like Josh, was raised Episcopalian, but nowadays I call myself an eclectic universalist — and I’m also a member of a Friends Meeting, but they don’t impose any particular creed on me.  Still, as a universalist, I would never intentionally say something that would be hurtful to someone of any faith, unless it was part of a legitimate, constructive discussion — not just casually blowing off steam.

Granted this fan who was retweeted has a legitimate gripe with the cost of college. I feel for her.  But that doesn’t mean that she needs to make religiously offensive statements.  And it most especially does not mean that Josh has to retweet these statements to almost 800k people.

Some fans have complained that they think Josh is sadistic, that he says things just to get a rise out of his fans -- that he loves seeing us get all atwitter (pun intended), that the ruckus appeals to his sadistic side.  Really?  It’s ok to torture people for fun?

Take it down @joshgroban.  Take it down.

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Addendum 1/13/15

It's still up there tho you have to scroll down a bit to find it -- December 29.  

Progress on the quixotic quest

I'm seeing a bit of progress on my quixotic quest for the world anthem.  If you want to know more about my history with this quest, please search this blog for "quixotic."

This was my original letter to Josh Groban on this topic Letter to Josh to start you out.

UN Imagine Project

I recently noticed Jackie Evancho participating in the UN #IMAGINE project, via the following YouTube video:


JACKIE EVANCHO AND FRIENDS FOR UN #IMAGINE PROJECT

This project is trying to get people all over the world to sing John Lennon's song "Imagine" together.

If you want to register for this project, go to the following link

 UN #IMAGINE PROJECT

This song is a very popular song, worldwide, and it does advocate for world peace, which is cool, but I'm surprised that UNICEF chooses it, because it is fundamentally an atheist song -- imagining no God.  This isn't a very unifying theme in a world where many people are far from being atheists.  I would prefer a song that is religion neutral.  Still, I'm glad that they're trying.

Unfortunately, tho, I don't see how you can participate in the project unless you have an iphone or an ipad.  I personally have an Android phone.  How do I sign up?  I don't know yet.

Free U2 song

Since I originally formulated this quixotic quest, I've broadened it somewhat.  I would like to see multiple opportunities for international celebration: not only singing a world anthem together, but also having international holidays, where everyone celebrates or laughs together, like the Mayan Apocalypse . I would like to see the development of international culture, a sense of us, rather than us/them.

In this respect I am noticing that a free song that I got from Sony/U2 called "Invisible" has this as part of the chorus.  "There is no us. There is no them."  I'm not sure if Sony gave this song away free, because they wanted to promote a U2 album, or whether they were pushing it as a song to promote World Peace.  I find the song a bit difficult to follow, but I am noting that this piece of the chorus is a peace theme (semi-accidental pun) and generally in line with my quixotic quest ideas, so I'm glad that Sony decided to distribute it so broadly.

Anyway, I continue to be encouraged about what seems like some gradual progress on my quixotic quest idea.

The Messiah, Avery Fisher Hall, 12/17/14

This was the third concert in the series that I got because I wanted to see Josh on September 17.

The first I blogged about already.  

The second was disappointing to me, because I went hoping to hear Joshua Bell play, but I experienced narcolepsy as soon as his bow hit the stings. That's been a recurring problem for me: classical music giving me narcolepsy. So I can't even describe his playing. That's one if the things I've always hated about classical music.

After Bell was a piece by a Russian composer, whose music kept me awake by the crude device of extremely loud drumming. Just not a great experience.   I do wonder if they're adequately monitoring that carbon dioxide in those places, or whether it's really the music itself.

Anyway, the Messiah, I'm glad to report, did not give me narcolepsy. I'm not sire I've every heard the whole thing before. It's really quite a long piece. I did get a bit drowsy and bored by end, but basically it was a good experience, and no narcolepsy. Perhaps that was because of the vocal solos having a different acoustic quality from the violin. Perhaps it was better ventilation. I'm not sure, but I appreciated the difference.

I am a real sucker for child singers. They had am eleven year old boy, Connor Tsui, singing a few passages. His voice and diction were delightfully clear and strong, and he was the only one on stage who had memorized his part.

I once sang at least part of the Messiah. I seem to recall the soloists bring soprano, alto, tenor, bass. Here they had soprano, countertenor, tenor, bass. I suppose this was more authentic, as probably they had no women singing on stage in Handel's time, and the countertenor was excellent, but it did feel a bit male dominated.

I thought the baritone was the weakest soloist. The part called for a bass. I was craving someone with a deeper, more booming voice.

This was an evening where I was acutely conscious of how exciting it is to be in NYC during the Christmas season.


I walked from Grand Central Station to Lincoln Center via Rockefeller Center and Columbus Circle. Rockefeller Center was jammed with tourists. It was almost impossible to get through there.   I thought about how people watch this stuff on TV and YouTube all over the world, and I get to go there all the time.

I remembered seeing David Foster performing there at Rockefeller Center via the Internet. He came from California to do that.

When they sang the Alleluia chorus during the Messiah, I cried. I was so glad to get to experience that.  

"Home Free" Sugar Loaf Performing Arts Center 12/5/14

I just got back from a concert by the a cappella vocal group “”Home Free” at the Sugar Loaf Performing Arts Center in Chester, NY.

This was such a fun time.  I can’t recommend them highly enough.   This a peppy group, with a lot of funny songs and extraordinary performers and performances.  

Here are links to a some  of their YouTube videos.  These people really do sound just as good in person as in these videos.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BuyGVhQFLbs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0l3dsHCScxU (including Avi Kaplan of Pentatonix)

This group of five young men recently won a TV singing contest called “Sing Off” on NBC.  They include a remarkable vocal percussionist, Adam Rupp, and a remarkable basso profundo, Tim Faust; along with superb tenors and a decent baritone.  More about the group https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Home_Free_(group)

This group features solos by all of their performers, so that you can really hear each intriguing voice.  

The bass, who can also sing tenor, gets to be a lead quite often, which is not the traditional thing with vocal groups.  Tim Faust was for me the big draw.  He actually wrote or arranged several of the songs they perform.

Here’s an example of a wonderful song that Tim wrote

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1L8zGfKDCCY 

The solo by the vocal percussionist was probably the most exciting thing about this show.  This one performer filled the theater for an extended solo which had us all on our feet twice.  

They also told us that the two albums that they’ve issued with the current composition of the group have been in the billboard top 100 albums this year.  I personally purchased “Crazy Life,” their debut album with the current group and love it.

I’m interested that I enjoy this group, because normally I don’t like country music.  I think the difference is that they *are* a cappella, so there are no strummed guitars, which are normally present in country music.  I generally can’t tolerate the sound of amplified strummed guitars.  They aggravate my auditory sensitivities.  So I’m pleased that this group has a different take on the genre.

I didn’t write down the set list.  I was a bit surprised, because I had been watching YouTube videos of their previous tour, which was promoting the previous album, Crazy Life.  This tour was promoting their current album, which is a Christmas album.  I was a bit uncomfortable, because the friend I had brought with me is Jewish, but fortunately she liked the music anyway.  Plus they only focused the first half on the Christmas album.  They had some of the songs from the Crazy Life album in the second half.

I’m not quite sure that I like this style of singing for traditional carols like “Oh Holy Night,” but I’ll have to listen some more, because I do like the group.

Afterwards they did hang around to autograph albums, but I didn’t stay for that.  Probably that was a mistake.  It think this group is going to be big, I mean even bigger than they already are, but I just didn’t have the energy.

There was a great variety of ages in the audience and both female and male fans.  The audience was almost exclusively white, with a few Asians, from what I could see.

The facility

————————

I had also never been to the Sugar Loaf Performing Arts Center before.  It’s a really cool place, which has a sort of country/western theme, with the balcony looking vaguely reminiscent of a hay loft.  Also, the parking is free, which you don’t see closer in to New York City. There were ample restrooms and a lovely entry and concession area.

I had two complaints about this facility, just for the record

1) they seemed to use real smoke rather than water vapor for effects during the show.  This sometimes had my eyes burning and coughing.  I can’t imagine what it must have been like for the singers.

2) the concession stand did not have coffee, which is not great for a place in an isolated rural area, where you have to drive home late at night through dark and rainy highways.