My Interpretation of "February Song"

Josh has said that this is a song he wrote to himself.

First I want to note the word “February.”

 During the “Closer” tour, Josh sang “My December.”  At that time, his girlfriend was January Jones, his only public relationship.  I believe that “My December” symbolized getting into January.

Similarly, he wrote a “February Song” on the “Awake” album.  I believe that at the time these lyrics symbolized getting past January; however, this song is still very important to him, even though he’s probably long past her.  I conclude that the song has a more general meaning for him now.

Despite it being his birthday month, February is nevertheless a very depressing month for many people – especially for those with seasonal affective disorder.  It’s when winter seems like it is going to last forever.  Therefore, I take it that this song has become about getting past depression in general, not just about January Jones.

I believe, too, that the fan and press drama around that relationship is why he now is so secretive about relationships.  He was a very shy guy, when younger, and still complains of shyness.  It must have been excruciating having his first real relationship be so public.

Where has that old friend gone Lost in a February song	He likes to present a cheerful façade to the world.  He sees himself as cheerful.  He thinks of that persona as his old friend.  He asks where that persona went.
Tell him it won't be long Til he opens his eyes	This friend, the cheerful Josh, is asleep.  He is going to wake up again.  He needs to be reassured that he will wake up again.
Where is that simple day Before colors broke into shades	Life was simpler before, and more colorful.  Now it’s darker.
And how did I ever fade Into this life, into this life	How did I fade like this?
And I never want to let you down	He feels that he is letting himself and others down, if he’s a bummer, if he’s not cheerful all the time.
Forgive me if I slip away	He asks forgiveness for not being cheerful
When all that I've known is lost and found I promise you I, I'll come back to you one day	He promises to come back to the state that he feels is more truly him.  He has lost a relationship, which seemed like everything to him at the time, but he’s finding something as well.
Morning is waking up And sometimes it's more than just enough	Things are getting better.  It’s important to take pleasure in simple things, like just getting up in the morning.
When all that you need to love Is in front of your eyes It's in front of your eyes	The world is full of great stuff, if you are open to it.  You can love all that great stuff, if you focus on it.
Sometimes it's hard to find the ground Cause I keep on falling as I try to get away From this crazy world	He’s having a hard time finding his footing, despite feeling that he should get better faster.  He keeps making mistakes, falling into depression.  The world seems “crazy” – overwhelming, not the way he thinks it should be.

One pattern that I think I’m seeing in these songs is intolerance of negative mood, both in himself and others.  I wish I could tell him that expecting to be happy all the time is not realistic.

People who are still with Josh, especially after “Illuminations,” which was such a sad album, are going to be people who don’t mind being around depression, who like depressed songs.  Personally, I’ve always liked sad songs in minor keys.  Perhaps they help me express my own feelings of sadness.

I wonder if he needs to lower his expectations of himself -- to be cheerful all the time -- and also his expectations of women that they will be cheerful all the time (please see below in this blog, my interpretations of Hidden Away and False Alarms).

I think, too, that artists are naturally emotional, fragile people.  That’s why they are able to tap into those emotions to entertain us with their drama.  Those emotions are a kind of gift they have, but it’s a painful gift.